Malvina Dunder

In psychology there is a concept of PROJECTION and it is a pity that we are not taught about it at school yet. It would be much easier for us to understand each other and ourselves.

What is this?
The human psyche works in such a way that it does not want to see things in ourselves that we don’t like, and carefully hide those things from the conscious mind. That is why we have “a mirror”  that is our outside world, surroundings and people.

In a nutshell, it’s the emotions, feelings and beliefs that we suppress and see in others or the outside world.

It’s about what triggers us, not what we casually notice (it’s a great thing to see more obviously).

Examples:
If we do not accept our anger – we will see people in our surrounding who in our opinion seems angry often.

Many people may have this problem, because anger is not a “polite” emotion, we have been taught since childhood that it is not good to feel it, and it’s better to suppress it. We often tend to feel remorse after getting angry (conscious or subconscious) because we strive to be perfect and such a flaw we perceive as unacceptable. If we are unaware, we will experience more and more situations triggering us in this way.

If we are impressed by someone because this person is for example charismatic, it means that we have the same quality or potential. Maybe we have heard a compliment about it from someone before, but were thinking it’s exaggeration. Our purpose is to develop our potential and use it. Playing weak is not beneficial for anyone.

Why is this important?
Hiding some parts of yourself, rejecting yourself, suppressing emotions leads to unhealthy behaviours. We try to be perfect, and this is the so-called ego trap. We reject parts of ourselves, and therefore do not love ourselves fully – this entails a number of unfortunate events. We do things that are not in line with our true self, so that others would accept us.

If we love all parts of ourselves we start to see a clear picture, not our own projections.

Digging into these deeply hidden emotions and feelings gives freedom, harmony, understanding and we can shine our beautiful, clean light.

It’s not like we will stay in this bliss forever because we are human and this dark side will always be a part of us. But each time it will be easier because we know the tools to deal with it and we are gaining more and more experience.

Key word: do not reject – accept ❤

We often hear advice like “let it go, don’t think about it”, but it’s hard to do with a power of will. We cannot help it, but our mind runs thoughts asking why this happened, how this person could do this, he or she is like this and that… Our brain can be quite stubborn 😉

However, with a deep understanding of the projection, we are able to understand people, look at them like on our teachers sharing a useful insight.

Task no 1
This is a popular exercise to work with the acceptance of your shadow side and to understand the projection. It is simple but could be very annoying for the ego 😉 It is the most effective when you write it down on a piece of paper.

1. Think about a person who triggers you often (the most annoying person).
2. Why?
3. Read it like it is about you. How is this connected with you? Have you ever behaved like this? Maybe you really wanted but surpassed it? Maybe you were like this in the past? Could you be like this in the future?
4. What it teaches you? What is the silver lining? How can you turn it into an advantage?

Wow, what an exercise and challenge to write the worst about someone and read it as if you are talking about yourself… 😅

Task no 2
This one is easier.

1. Think about a person who impresses you.
2. Why?
3. Read it like it’s about you. It is already a part of you or a potential you have.
4. How can you develop it and use it for good?

Task no 3
Every time you think in a negative way about yourself, stop and say /think “I love and accept this part of myself” or expand it with your own words “I accept the part of me that felt anger and fear, I did my best at the moment, I learn from this and I know that I am enriched with experience.”
At the beginning, it’s like practicing a new habit, so be patient with yourself.

You don’t have to be perfect to be perfect 🙂